Secrets, Lies & Self-Esteem

When I look back to how I set my inner compass in my twenties, I am thankful for a quote that I read and took to heart. It came from an article on self-esteem (out of Cosmopolitan magazine of all things!).

It was simple: Never say anything about anyone behind their backs that you wouldn’t say to their face.

The author of the statement said that way, you would never feel shame for saying something you probably shouldn’t have. Contrary to what you might currently believe, self-esteem isn’t about how you look or how you allow other people to treat you- it is about honesty and knowing that you had nothing to be ashamed of. Granted, I may say things to peoples face that they don’t want to hear. They may get mad at me about it. But I never say anything about someone that I would later be ASHAMED of having said. I changed my behavior after reading that article. I no longer piled on insults if the gang was picking on a member who wasn’t there. Or said something glibly because I knew it would get a laugh, even at the expense of someone else’s feelings. I no longer kept secrets about what I said.

Another reason to tell the truth (I know, sometimes you can keep secrets simply by exclusion of something, not lying) is that the vibration of the statement will be lower if you lie. All of the Angels and the Universe talks in vibration. If a statement is the truth, there is a high note to it. If there is a lie in a statement, there is a ‘thunk’ – very similar to the sound of a crystal glass that is cracked. For dogs, they can tell if a human is lying because we give off a different smell. Most people, even if they cannot feel the vibration in the sentence know within their higher self what is truth and what is a lie. When someone says a statement with a lie in it, it sounds hollow. I won’t always know what the lie is, but I will know a lie is there. If you want someone to take you seriously, lying about frivolous things will make sure that doesn’t happen.

I was already not keeping secrets behind people’s back about how I felt. I examined the secrets I had, knowing that keeping secrets take up energy. You have to remember what you told someone the truth was, not what the actual truth is. With the truth, there is one story. It is easy to remember because it is the truth. With a secret, you make up something that is supposed to be the truth, then you have to remember it and keep your stories straight. You might tell different people different versions of that story. Lies are more complicated.

One of the things the Angels and Guides have been communicating with me constantly the last two years is that the vibration of the planet is rising. This happens when we chose love over hate, chose to embrace someone instead of alienate them, or in my case, help earthbound spirits cross to heaven. We have finally hit a high enough caliber that for the first time in human history, the lessons we come down here to learn and embrace can be taught through joy instead of the indoctrination of opposites. You see until now, when you are incarnated to learn something in this earth school, you are put in a situation where you experience the exact opposite. If you are to learn to love yourself, you are put in a situation where no one loves you or probably even consciously knows how to love. It will break open your connection to your higher self, which innately knows it is of value and loveable. It will be a hard won journey, because you will travel so far. Perhaps on the way you will find those that love you, mirroring for you what you need to learn yourself, yet because you think you are unlovable you can’t feel their love.

Not only have we gotten the Planetary vibration higher so that we can learn from joy, now all secrets will become known. That too, is different than any other time in history. When you lie, creating a secret, you don’t realize that these secrets will have to be kept your entire life. That you will be supporting them and following energy to them. That by lying, you are saying that there is something about yourself or your actions that you don’t want other people to know. Which brings up the first paragraph; if you lie about something, it is saying that the truth isn’t good enough. That you, as you are, are not enough. This erodes self-esteem.

When you keep a secret/lie it lives with you every day, like the pebble in your shoe. Some people lie just to make themselves more interesting, and to you I say – get more interesting activities! ACTUALLY LIVE your life, don’t just make up stories about it. If you feel like you are trapped in your life – dead end job, no relationship or a bad relationship, no money, no resources, did a bad thing you can’t forgive yourself for – I can tell you without exception that that simply isn’t true.

What is true is that when I have a session with the person above, and the Angels make suggestions for them to lead a more fulfilling life, the suggestions can be met with a defeatist response. These may include but are not limited to: “you don’t know my life”. “There is no way things are going to change”. “You haven’t had to go through what I’ve gone through”, “it would be nice”, to the simply profound, “I can’t”.

Seriously, the first person we have to talk in to a better life is ourselves. We have to believe that there is “Nothing wrong with us”, or that “God isn’t punishing us”. Everything we are here for hinges on free will and the ability to make another choice. No matter what the situation, where you are in your life, how tired and defeated you are, YOU CAN ALWAYS MAKE ANOTHER CHOICE. A choice to learn through joy perhaps. In manifesting things, action is important, but belief is the whole ball of wax. If you believe it, the Universe contrives to show you it is possible, that it will happen.

We build self-esteem one day, one interaction at a time. Again, not talking behind people’s back increases self-esteem. Every time we tell the truth about who we are and are met with acceptance, we increase self-esteem. That makes us feel worthy. And all of a sudden, those excuses to not live our best life don’t seem so plausible after all.